This purse is going on probation

So I really do like this obnoxious yellow leather purse I bought on a
trip downtown, bit today it has gone too far.
I kept wondering why it was getting heavier recently, when I kept
looking in it and seeing a reasonable amount of stuff.
I learned today that it's been eating things i have been putting on
the inside pocket.... To be accurate, 6 tubes of lipstick(!!!), a
Swiss army knife, 2 pens, a set of keys to J's car, and a full roll of
Sweet Tarts a friend gave me!
Oh dear. Back to my Libby Dibby!