Early will I rise - re•joy

Sunday morning. I woke up a few minutes to 7 as came down to our group's sewing room to get coffee. No one was there, all was silent (very silent, considering how loud and silly we were last night).
I decided that since the sun wasn't up past the mountain and the wind hadn't picked up, it was a good time to come sit on the hill overlooking this valley. I brought my coffee, my quilt tops to photograph and got to watch a silent sunrise. It's quiet here.
Each morning I have been able to sit over this valley and breathe. Between the time to sit still, the time to be creative and the laughter, I feel little bits of healing taking place.
I've also found quiet moments to think, to shed tears, to share.
Yesterday I had a short massage and there was a place the masseuse touched in my back that almost caused me to cry out - emotionally, not physically. This thought flashed in my mind: "I am carrying so much pain!" and then when she moved her hands, the thought was gone. That amazed me. I've been asked by a few people to think about and find out where I carry that pain, because our physical bodies connect to our hearts. But not until yesterday did I understand the connection was so visceral.
And if that is true, then 45 minutes of quiet overlooking a valley each day also has to have some true healing properties. So I'm soaking up this sun now as its risen.
I'll share my quilt tops with you later....

LAMQG - speed sewing for charity

We've been sewing all weekend, with a few breaks for meals and LOTS of laughing.
As one of the folks who is helping our guild have a vision for giving back with our time and talent, I thought it would be fun if we all gave 1/2 hour and speed made blocks for a charity quilt. So last night, a few us us prepared by finding a cute color scheme from our scraps pile and we all speed pieced improv blocks.

By 1/2 hour, we had 20 blocks and by 1.5 hours (four of us kept on the clock after the initial push), we had a finished top and 2 blocks for the back.

It's been suggested that we do this more often, what a fun way to work together and give back.

Re•joy - getaway

I've spent my mornings the past few days overlooking this valley. It's quiet. And beautiful. And big enough to hold a lot of thinking. I listen to the wind in the trees and drink coffee, and then head into a wonderfully happy room filled with happy friends to work on projects with for the weekend.
My quilt guild is having a retreat and I'm so happy I came. After our crazy past few months, I've not spent super much concentrated time in groups, I've generally avoided them, honestly. But these friends are safe and it's perfectly acceptable for me to do my own thing if I have to and come back to fill up on laughter again with them when I am ready. I'll post my projects that I've even working on today... After getting a few more hours in to play.

Re•building joy - letters

I'm known (or at least I used to be) for being a faithful letter writer. Email has had an impact for sure, but I love getting mail and tend to find folks like myself who also love to exchange letters.
Many parts of me became buried in these past few years of motherhood and my misadventures as a foster mom. One of them was my ability to keep in touch with my friends. I still sent letters to a select few. I still managed to get some cards as care packages out over the past two years, but things have all but dried up the past year. I didn't have nights of writing letters to beloved friends across the miles. I barely kept in touch with my friends in LA. If you didn't live in my neighborhood - and sometimes if you did - or weren't in my quilt guild - ... [silence].
Part of my joy•building is trying to reclaim things I remember loving before. I remember when I had broken my knee in high school and had to relearn how to act "natural" when I walked after surgery. It kind of feels like that... ... It takes effort to remember the parts of that may flit around happily in a time of joy, but disappear in times of grief and loss, and all the other feelings we had...
So tonight, I wrote letters. And drank strawberry tea (out of my Meetinghouse Farms mug which I made from the Worth family's farm logo a while ago)
It wasn't instantly easy, but I know it's "me". And I want to be here for my friends, after so long gone.

Re•building Joy - The Courage Quilt

I've already announced that it's done, but today I added the label and wrapped the 100% hand sewn quilt.
The label says, "to the bravest person we have ever met".

Making this quilt calmed my nerves during that crazy year. Having her (the giftee, our social worker) alongside us, gave me courage.

I'm quietly joyful that pain can be turned into something beautiful. I'm learning that by releasing this pain slowly and appropriately, it's like a fizzy soda that I am able to let out.
If things come out in methods of beauty and art, they seem to be in a manner that I can control. As I share the art and meaning, I'm able to tell small parts of my story without crumbling into fragile pieces.
By sharing this with you and others, some of those fizzy bubbles of pain are released slowly. And some beauty can rise from the ashes.

 I have to also admit that I am happy to let this quilt out of my hands. It is very painful for me to look at. Hundreds of hours of pain, fear, anxiety, anger and dread were channelled into this. It will be a big release to let the gift bring love and joy to someone who matters so much to me. Plus I think it's really pretty!

A new WIP- my big bee quilt

I received the squares back from my Seams Perfect Bee a year ago. But I am only now sure what I want to do with them. (been thinking about it long enough!) I spent tonight on an hour and a half math problem that is figuring out the layout, yardage needed and plan for my king sized quilt top. I used 3 continuous pages of gridded paper and at least two tracing paper options were tried on top of that.
And the verdict? ... I have to go back to the fabric store and HOPE the 2 yards I still need of the background fabric are still available.
And I need to go tomorrow as I have big plans to go on my sewing retreat with my guild friends this weekend.
Yippee! A fun errand.

9 women create

I have a great friend, Sarah, who urged me to join her last December, in putting up at a silent auction - a collage day, at her amazing house, with 8 spots for people to join us. We would feed them a nice lunch, then share our materials (sarah and I take a collage class together already and have a lot of materials between us) and teach some simple techniques to our attendees.
The spaces filled up fast! And with good friends! She and I have been working on this for the past few weeks and Saturday was the big day. We got everything ready and hoped everyone would show up and have a good time. One friend couldn't make it, but we saved supplies for her. The other 9 of us had a day full of creativity.

It was so much more fun than I even anticipated, and 4 hours to make art on a Saturday is always fun. But this was dear. And creative. And joy•building for sure.
Everyone walked away with finished art pieces, as well as some traded Artist Trading Cards - our first activity was to make artist trading cards to share with everyone else as a warm up and a commemorative keepsake. Of course I made goodie bags too, with candy, new scissors and glue sticks... (all three are vital to my collaging!)

I felt so blessed to know these women, or to meet the ones I hadn't yet met... We kept joking that now we were a collage clique and we have to do it again. I sure hope so.

Sewing machine Sketch

The thing about a sewing machine is that a bad one will make you hate sewing, while a good one will inspire you SEW much that you think about it when you're not even sewing. ;)
I have one of each. The frustrating one (a very fussy Pfaff) is now on vacation down at my dad's studio and gets used on my days there. The other one is a simple, much less expensive, but non-finicky Kenmore (Janome) that makes me happy every time I use it. And even when I'm not using it, like when I am sketching with Z in the early mornings.

First finished quilt of 2012

Wow. It only took about a year, but I did it. And finished tonight, the 100% hand sewn, (English Paper pieced) quilt. I wanted to know if I could do it. (I can, apparently) Even Mimi knows this is a big deal and asked me today if this was only using my hands and no machines... Not even an iron.)
I was so proud to say YES.
This photo was taken of me a few weeks ago as I promised my guild that I'd finish it soon.
Promise completed.
I think my favorite part about it is how the neutrals look all mixed together, acting as one piece ... And then are all punctuated by the red thick hand quilting. Very much unexpected from how I started this, but that's what creativity is for.
All that's left is to do the label and get some good pics.

Re•building joy - Jan 19

A second time recently, I've been able to take advantage of a quiet room in my dads office building that I am allowed to come sew in, at my convenience. It's not close to my home, but it's peaceful, perfect for sewing, and I get to have lunch with my parents as an added bonus.
I was there all day yesterday, working on 4 different projects I've been sketching through for over a year. The ideas are finally getting realized and the only way I can describe my feeling is to say that it feels like I may be getting creatively "un-clogged".
The way I am is that I work on many things at once, depending on my mood or inspiration. Some ideas strike and are completed within an hour or a day or week. The ones that start as concepts with sketches and more thought actually stay in my head and sketchbooks a long time before being realized because it's easy to bypass them for today's inspiration.
To get 4 sketches turned into actual tangible projects is so encouraging. It makes me wonder what will come once these are all worked out.
You'll see these projects all developing with me over the next few months, but here's a peek through the door into "a room of one's own" - the place where I'm weekly working out my creativity and thought processes as I seek to unclog the dusty trails in my brain. (note the coffee mug and the speakers for my latest playlist to also inspire... And yes, that is my old easel from college art days. Someday I hope to have a place to set it up at home.)